After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
