Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
