their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
You need a sexual gate keeper
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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