I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
