Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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