yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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