Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
In other news, I just burned my penis
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
His nipple licking is glorious
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