You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
