You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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