white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
love makes seman taste better
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
