I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize