Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
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