I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
