You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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