you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Randomize
