dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
