: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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