dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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