careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
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