White coat. Heels.
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
