I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Randomize