are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Randomize
