There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
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