who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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