something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Randomize
