I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
