This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I just gift wrapped bread.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize