I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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