His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
