Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
