doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
