theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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