no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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