I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
