Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
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