Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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