it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
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This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
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Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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