high people should be assigned attendants
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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