This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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