i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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