talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Randomize
