I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize