the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I think my vagina is haunted
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize