Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
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Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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