dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Randomize
