is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
