went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
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