I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize