Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I checked into jail on foursquare
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
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