You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
she pinky promised me she was 18
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
